This story is part of a long tradition of absurdism in journalism, and builds on a western reliquary culture. In this world, the one true cross must be huge and John the Baptist rivals Cerberus on the head count front. I wouldn’t give much credence to it as part of some dastardly British propaganda plot though. Any more than they might seriously suppose Elvis was in the fast food business or that TFL was having it’s surplus buses being disposed of by NASA.
Yes, if you read an account of how his body was treated, there was little chance anyone could have secretly removed his penis.